A Maple Leaf Foods plant is linked to an outbreak of Listeriosis causing folks across Canada to clear their fridges of any tainted meat products. Has anyone seen the Maple Leaf ads with their CEO making a public plea to continue to buy turkeys from them this holiday season? I’d rather serve Spam thanks.Some poor fella has his head lopped off by a lunatic while traveling on a Greyhound bus in Manitoba. I get annoyed with riff raff on the bus myself, funnily decapitation hasn’t once crossed my mind.
Team China enlists under-agers to compete in gymnastic events during the Beijing Summer Olympics. Oops, that hasn’t been proven yet. Right.
Sarah Palin endeavors to take over the White House alongside John McCain in the 2008 U.S. presidential election and can see Russia from her front porch. She was also one of Googles top search words for 2008.
Heath Ledger dies of an accidental overdose and gives one of the years best performances as the Joker in The Dark Knight. If you haven’t seen this film, check it out over some ‘nogg this holiday.The Jonas Brothers are famous. What the fuck.
Barack Obama is the 44th President of the United States of America. Yes he did.
Jen Aniston’s body is a wonderland, then it’s not, oh but wait, now it is again. John Mayer bounces from various babes, but eventually lands on Team Aniston.
California passes a ban on gay marriage and therefore demonstrates that there is a large population of morons residing in this state. Luckily, Ellen Degeneres celebrated her nuptials to longtime partner Portia De Rossi before this occurred.
Lindsay Lohan’s a lesbo...allegedly.
The Liberals join forces with the NDP and Bloc Quebecois in an effort to overthrow Stephen Harper. Harper pulls the plug on their pity party and puts parliament on hold until the new year.
Jay Z liked it so he finally put a ring on it. Nick cannon did too (but
Mariah probably paid for it).Madonna ditches Guy and is rumored to be running around town with New York Yankees star A-Rod. The boys keep getting younger but Madge just stays the same age.
We’re in a worldwide recession folks. In case you hadn’t noticed.
Brit Brit is back and looking better than ever. Let’s hope she avoids another buzz cut followed by an angry brellie attack.
OJ Simpson is sentenced to 15 years in prison. Better late than never.
CTV sells out over sensational coverage of the recent Blackcomb Gondola incident. Given CTV was awarded exclusive rights to cover the 2010 Winter Games, it all seems a tad
counterproductive, no?Trevor Linden retires his jersey to the rafters of GM Place. You may have been #16 on the ice Trev, but you’ll always be #1 in our hearts.
December brings crazy snow storms to our fair city, making it impossible to wear heels or drive without owning an off-road vehicle. I feel as though I’ve been quarantined.
Merry merry possums, I hope Santa spoils you all rotten.
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