The French Connection

Possums! The Urban Cowgirl is finally back in the saddle - pun intended - with all sorts of travel tales to share. My original intent was to blog intermittently throughout my trip however the bloody French/Spanish keyboards made this a touch painful. So, in keeping it real, I opted for my trusty journal instead.

First stop - Paris. Having been there before I had already checked off all things touristy, so this time around I decided I would soak in the city, people watch and eat my face off...naturally. I arrived in the morning full of piss and vinegar so I ditched my bags and enthusiastically headed to...the cemetery. Yes, that is correct possums. A friend of mine reminded me that Jim Morrison was buried in a Parisian cemetery and asked me to take a few snaps of his grave...so I hopped on the Metro and took my morbid ass over to the Pere Lachaise Cemetery to check it out. Buried amongst the likes of Oscar Wilde and a plethora of Napoleon's cronies, most visitors seemed only interested in swarming the grave site of Mr. Morrison. I had hoped to stumble upon some hippies pouring a bottle of whiskey over the rock legend’s grave, but no such luck.

It just so happens that Fashion Week kicked off the day before I arrived. Coincidence? One would think not, however it was just my luck and lucky I was indeed. I scoped out show locales online and discovered the Gaspard Yurkievich show was taking place at the Louvre. Not too shabby of a venue I must say. I ventured to the famed museum to see if I could stumble upon any celebrities in a stalker-like fashion. Turns out they keep the riff raff (and by that I mean a mix of fashion victims, Paris’s elite and a handful of media) and the celebs in separate rooms before going in for the show. What I didn’t know was how easy it would be to sneak in there! With no ticket and a sub-par ensemble (i decided to wear all black, you know, the mod bitch look), I loitered around the line up to get in. Next thing I know some gal with a head set on is handing me a bag of goodies and ushering me inside. Ofcourse, sans ticket, I ended up standing in the back but no one even questioned it?! ‘C’est bonne’ i think to myself. I did not see any celebs, which let’s face it was the real reason I was there, but Yurkievich did put on a good show.

The only problem with visiting Paris during Fashion Week is the influx of perfect people...and I do mean perfect. I’ll meet your Mary Magdalen Paris and raise you two bulimic models. My day concluded with dinner on Il Saint Louis before heading home to prep for my flight to Marrakech the next morning. I did, however, have a slight run-in with a Parisian man who decided to chat my ear off while heading home on the train. As I reached my stop, he began to double-cheek kiss me incessantly, reminiscent of SNL’s Bellissimo bit where Carvey, Sandler and Schneider are Italian waiters licking Kirstie Alley's face. Nice.

Au revoir for now possums.

Photo credits - Urban Cowgirl

The Urban Cowgirl is hittin’ the road!

In the coming weeks, I'll be blogging via remote locations, such as the Sahara desert in Morocco (do they have Wi-Fi there?), the southern beaches of Portugal and over a pitcher or two of Sangria in Spain.

Ciao possums. xx

Pucker up piggies - we’re putting on lipstick north and south of the 49th

In recent months I’ve watched the drama surrounding the American election unfold, and with mere weeks to go before Americans hit the polls, I find myself wondering...what exactly are the key issues each party plans to address? So far I’ve been able to piece together 2 things - Sarah Palin is a foxy hockey mom who claims to have a lovely view of Russia from her front porch while Barrack Obama promises to impose a ban on the application of lipstick for citizens of pig-like proportions.

I’ve always been under the impression that the lead up to any election should be a time for political parties to bring their A-game and pitch their platform to the voting public. Yet, once again the mud slinging and scandals have taken over and I have to admit, it all makes for a sexier campaign. After all, controversy is what captures the public's attention, which is why many Canadians are completely unaware that we too are about to vote in a federal election.

A federal election in Canada is about as exciting as a game of curling (can you believe they televise that shit!?)...until now. Finally some dirt is beginning to surface and it’s completely turned my attention away from the US and onto what really matters. Like, the fact that candidates from both the Liberal and NDP parties have been engaged in naked protests, drugs and sexy time. Its-a niiiice, I-a liiiike.

You have one NDP (formerly Green) candidate who was charged with dropping his gear and requesting that a group of minors ‘body paint him all over’. Charming. Then you have a Liberal candidate who previously posed as Lady Godiva - naked - on horse back in a protest against logging on Saltspring Island. Come on Godiva, a few large scale hotels and casinos aren’t going to impact the island’s ecosystem that much. I kid, i kid.

Bottom line, our election is finally gaining momentum thanks to some wanker candidates with a closet full of skeletons. My attention will only drift back to the US should either candidate make mention of the many American NAFTA breaches that have occurred over the years but it won’t...they’re too busy trying to determine whether Palin or her daughter gave birth to that baby. God bless America.

Canada votes October 14.

The Urban Cowgirl's Make it a Double

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Once you go Mac you never go back

So I’ve gone and done it people. I’ve joined the ranks of hipster writers the world over. I’m playing for the other team. I’m one of the cool kids now. I’m the proud new owner of a Mac and I have to say - believe the hype.

It’s a spanky little machine, but what impressed me most about my Mac purchase was the experience. I was even offered an enthusiastic ‘congratulations’ as I made my way out of the store. As if I had just given birth to the thing. All things Apple seem to be at a level of ingenuity unmatched by their one and only competitor - Microsoft. For example, let’s take their new commercial starring Jerry Seinfeld. Have you seen this? What the devil made them think he would be an appropriate celeb to endorse the PC? Puzzling. He and Mr. Gates share an awkward moment together…ahem, shoe shopping. I was completely confused as to what exactly they were trying to pedal here. Jerry Seinfeld and Bill Gates for Payless Shoes perhaps? Good god. See bizarre-o ad below:



This latest attempt has only left Microsoft looking less sexy next to Apple’s low-budget yet impactful ads starring D-list actor Justin Long, (who was temporarily A-list during his brief courtship with Drew Barrymore). Apple was even cutting edge back in 1984 when Macintosh first hit the market. Remember this ad? It's and oldie, but a goodie:



Less is more folks. Perhaps Microsoft should consider casting someone a bit less 1995 for their ads. Apple – 1, Microsoft – 0.